20 Ways The Lord of the Rings Is Both Christian and Catholic

by Stan Williams

About the author:
Stan Williams is executive producer of Nineveh’s Crossing http://www.ninevehscrossing.com/

The article is reprinted with permission from the author.

Tolkien had hoped that others would come after him and like other myths adapt the Middle-earth stories to make them both applicable and accessible to new generations. Peter Jackson is doing that, and by most accounts doing it well. The third and last film in the series will be released December 2003.

J.R.R. Tolkien wrote, "The Lord of the Rings is of course a fundamentally religious and Catholic work; unconsciously so at first, but consciously in the revision." [1] By design The Lord of the Rings is not a Christian allegory but rather an invented myth [2] about Christian and Catholic truths. But that presents a problem for filmmakers. Because the Christian…

…struggle is not against enemies of blood and flesh, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers of this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. (Eph. 6:12)

…and when it comes to movies, audiences must SEE everything and anything that is important to the story. So, the conflict cannot be something the protagonist engages on purely a spiritual or emotional level — such as guilt, forgiveness, justification, or redemption. The source of the conflict has to be visible.

Luckily — no, let's make that Providentially — Tolkien spent a life time sub-creating (as he called it) a Middle-earth that contains physical entities representing all that is good and bad in our Earthly journeys. There are Dwarves, Elves, Orcs, Wizards, Hobbits, Ents, Trolls, Wraiths, Uruk-hais and at least one Balrog — all with their own languages, cultures, history, and myths — to mix it up with humans in a grand and epic battle with evil.

But a battle against evil alone does not make The Lord of the Rings fundamentally Christian and Catholic; and yet there are many ways that it is. Below are a few of these and one that is unique to Jackson's films. Can you tell which one it is?

A Christian Myth

Here are some of the ways The Lord of the Rings is a Christian myth.


1. Darkness pervades Middle-earth where man, beast and nature are called to an adventure full of peril and hope. Here is how Elijah Wood explains the film's dominant theme: “No matter how bad things are, no matter how much evil there is in this world, there is always some good worth fighting for, worth standing up for, and worth some effort in carrying on.” [3]

2. The One Ring illustrates how evil can entice and enslave. Beautiful gold rings are enticing to wear. But when we slip them on our fingers we announce our devotion and loyalty to their owner.

3. Gandalf and Saruman, while not analogous, have traits, goals, and experiences similar to those of Jesus and Satan. Gandalf is even tempted in a battle with Saruman not unlike Christ is tempted by Satan in the wilderness.

4. Evil is parasitic and can only destroy that which was created. Everything that Ilúvatar (God) created in Middle-earth (and in our world) is good. It is the perversion and corruption of what was created that is evil. Good can exist on its own. Evil can only live off what is good.

5. Like all Christians, Frodo is called to risk his life through great peril to save others. Frodo, like us, does not appear to be up to the task. He does not have any obvious talent suited for war. But he is chosen, as we are. We are all necessary for God's grand plan to be fulfilled; and even the most unlikely and disgusting Gollum-like beast in our life is necessary. And when Frodo asks, "What can a little hobbit do?" — Isaiah answers, "A little child will lead them" (11:6).

6. In the Shire, the Hobbits come naturally to living a beatific life that Christ calls Christians to live by. The Hobbits are the meek that inherit the earth, the merciful who receive mercy, the pure in heart, and the peacemakers. (Mt. 5:3-12)

7. Like all Christians, Tolkien's characters are called to play roles in a story that is much greater and more important than they are aware. Just as we are not aware of all that has happened before us, [4] so Gandalf, at the end of The Hobbit, says to Bilbo, "You don't really suppose, do you, that all your adventures and escapes were managed by mere luck, just for your sole benefit? …you are only quite a little fellow in a wide world after all!"

8. There is a longing for the return of the king. As Christians long for the return of Christ the King, so the free people of Middle-earth long for their kingdoms to be once more united in peace and justice under the rightful heir. Did I mention that Aragorn looks like Christ?

9. The Fellowship of the Ring is constituted of different characters with different gifts suited for battling evil — the diversity keeps them united. This is not unlike the diversity of spiritual gifts and temporal talents given to the different members of the Christian community for the unity of the body — so that we might be dependent on each other.

10. Upon leaving Lórien, each of the Fellowship members are given custom fitted Elvish hooded cloaks not unlike St. Paul's amour in Ephesians 6:10-17. Again, Tolkien disliked allegory; so the cloaks are not exactly like St. Paul's amour of salvation. But they do have mystical traits of great aid that keep them safe in their battle with evil.

A Catholic Core

The Lord of the Rings is also Catholic.

11. There are sacraments not symbols. For their journey, Galadriel graciously bestows upon the Fellowship — a representation of the church — seven mystical gifts; no mere symbols these, but glimmering reflections of the Church's seven sacraments — the conveying of spiritual grace through temporal rites. And at her Mirror, Galadriel derides the Reformers' taunt of Eucharistic magic in the Mass when she says: "For this is what your folk would call magic, I believe; though I do not understand clearly what they mean; and they seem to use the same words for the deceits of the enemy." (353)

12. As grace and creation is experienced through a sacrament, so control and destruction is experienced through an anti-sacrament — the One Ring. The ring that Frodo bears is not symbolic, but rather operates as an anti-sacrament. Dependent on a person's spiritual disposition, a sacrament literally allows grace and life to flow into a person through the physical realm. Likewise in Middle-earth, the characters' spiritual disposition makes them more or less susceptible to the anti-sacrament power of the ring, which if worn, literally brings evil and destruction upon the bearer.

13. The protagonists pursue absolutes, rejecting any willingness to compromise or relativize. In Middle-earth there is an absoluteness of what is right and wrong. There is no hint of moral relativism that separates the different peoples, races, or creators of the freelands. Aragorn says to Éomer: "Good and ill have not changed since yesteryear; nor are they one thing among Elves and Dwarves and another among men." (428)

14. The protagonists embrace suffering as a requirement of working out their salvation. It isn't enough to simply believe or have faith. To be free of the tyranny of evil each of our protagonists must sacrifice, and work hard through great peril to secure their salvation and the right ordering of their world.

15. The Shire, described as the ideal community, reflects the social teachings of Catholicism. The Hobbits benefit from a community structure with little formal organization and less conflict. They work only enough to survive and otherwise enjoy each other's company. There is no jealousy, no greed, and rarely does anyone do anything unexpected. There is a wholeness and graciousness about it that seems to come naturally out of selflessness.

16. Gandalf, the steward of all things good in the world, reflects the papacy. Gandalf is leader of the free and faithful. He is steward of all things good in the world, but he claims rule over no land. As the Popes of history did with kings and emperors of our world, so Gandalf crowns the king and blesses him to rule with justice and peace.

17. Middle-earth ideology reflects a corporate moral hierarchy and not individualism. There is no democracy or republic in Middle-earth. There are spiritual leaders like Gandalf, and Kings like Theoden and Elessar with lords and vassals. There is no defense of individualism, no claim of choice, and no justification for an individual to follow his conscience.

18. There is a mystical Lady, like The Blessed Mother, who responds miraculously to pleas for help. The Lady is named Varda (or in Elvish, Elbereth or star-queen) and although she is never seen, she's is described as holy and queenly; and when her name is invoked — "O Elbereth! Gilthoniel! — as Frodo and Sam do on occasion, miracles follow that protect the quest and defeat the present enemy.

19. The sign of the cross. At the end of the first movie (and the beginning of the second book) Aragorn kneels beside the mortally wounded Boromir — and as he dies, Aragorn makes a rudimentary sign of the cross touching first his forehead and then his lips. It is a salute to Ilúvatar, the One who created all.

20. There is a last sharing of cup and bread, not unlike O.T. manna and its fulfillment in The Eucharist. Before the Fellowship departs from Lórien, Galadriel bids each to participate in a farewell ritual and drink from a common cup. More significant is the mystical Elvish food given to the fellowship — lembas or waybread. A small amount of this supernatural nourishment will sustain a traveler for many days.

All of this should make viewing or reading The Lord of the Rings a more interesting and insightful experience for both Christians and Catholics. A fuller description of these themes can be found in the following books that were used for this article.

Bibliography

J.R.R. Tolkien's Sanctifying Myth: Understanding Middle-earth. Bradley Birzer, 2003. Wilmington, DE: ISI Books.
Tolkien: A Celebration. Collected writings on a literary legacy. Edited by Joseph Pearce, 1999. San Francisco: Ignatius.
Finding God in The Lord of the Rings. Kurt Bruner and Jim Ware, 2001. Wheaton: Tyndale House.
Tolkien: Man and Myth. A literary life. Joseph Pearce, 1998. San Francisco: Ignatius.

Notes:

[1] While Tolkien has written that in sub-creating these stories his allegiance was to Christ and the Church, Jackson's allegiance was to Tolkien. Jackson made this comment to a group of Christian writers: "We wanted to honor Tolkien and obviously he was a very spiritual person. We've taken an approach of never trying to put in our own message or our own baggage into these films. We want the films to respect him and what he was about." (Interview, New York City, December 4, 2002)

[2] To Tolkien, myths are true because they are part of our God created imagination, and because they bring us "such joy [that] has the very taste of primary truth." To Tolkien the story of Jesus Christ is a "true myth." When Tolkien shared this concept with C.S. Lewis during an afternoon walk, Lewis felt "a rush of wind that came so suddenly," and within days proclaimed his belief in Christ, becoming one of Christianity's most effective apologists. (See also Tolkien's essay, On Fairy-Stories.)

[3] Interview, New York City, December 4, 2002.

[4] Read The Silmarillion by J.R.R. Tolkien and edited by his son Christopher, also the Appendix that immediately follows the third part of the trilogy: The Return of the King.

Copyright © 2003 Stan Williams

Battle against evil

St. Paul urges us to resist the evil using, as analogy, a Roman soldier equipment. He also encourage us to pray.

Latīna

Ephesios 6:10-20
(Vulgata Clementina)

10 De cetero, fratres, confortamini in Domino, et in potentia virtutis ejus.
11 Induite vos armaturam Dei, ut possitis stare adversus insidias diaboli :
12 quoniam non est nobis colluctatio adversus carnem et sanguinem, sed adversus principes, et potestates, adversus mundi rectores tenebrarum harum, contra spiritualia nequitiæ, in cælestibus.
13 Propterea accipite armaturam Dei, ut possitis resistere in die malo, et in omnibus perfecti stare.
14 State ergo succincti lumbos vestros in veritate, et induti loricam justitiæ,
15 et calceati pedes in præparatione Evangelii pacis,
16 in omnibus sumentes scutum fidei, in quo possitis omnia tela nequissimi ignea extinguere :
17 et galeam salutis assumite, et gladium spiritus (quod est verbum Dei),
18 per omnem orationem et obsecrationem orantes omni tempore in spiritu : et in ipso vigilantes in omni instantia et obsecratione pro omnibus sanctis :
19 et pro me, ut detur mihi sermo in apertione oris mei cum fiducia, notum facere mysterium Evangelii :
20 pro quo legatione fungor in catena, ita ut in ipso audeam, prout oportet me loqui.


English

Ephesians 6:10-20
(New American Bible)

10 Finally, draw your strength from the Lord and from His mighty power.
11 Put on the armor of God so that you may be able to stand firm against the tactics of the devil.
12 For our struggle is not with flesh and blood but with the principalities, with the powers, with the world rulers of this present darkness, with the evil spirits in the heavens.
13 Therefore, put on the armor of God, that you may be able to resist on the evil day and, having done everything, to hold your ground.
14 So stand fast with your loins girded in truth, clothed with righteousness as a breastplast,
15 and your feet shod in readiness for the gospel of peace.
16 In all circumstances, hold faith as a shield, to quench all the flaming arrows of the evil one.
17 And take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
18 With all prayer and supplication, pray at every opportunity in the Spirit. To that end, be watchful with all perseverance and supplication for all the holy ones
19 and also for me, that speech may be given me to open my mouth, to make known with boldness the mystery of the gospel
20 for which I am an ambassador in chains, so that I may have the courage to speak as I must.


Español

Efesios 6:10-20
(Reina-Valera 1995)

10 Por lo demás, hermanos míos, fortaleceos en el Señor y en su fuerza poderosa.
11 Vestíos de toda la armadura de Dios, para que podáis estar firmes contra las asechanzas del diablo,
12 porque no tenemos lucha contra sangre y carne, sino contra principados, contra potestades, contra los gobernadores de las tinieblas de este mundo, contra huestes espirituales de maldad en las regiones celestes.
13 Por tanto, tomad toda la armadura de Dios, para que podáis resistir en el día malo y, habiendo acabado todo, estar firmes.
14 Estad, pues, firmes, ceñida vuestra cintura con la verdad, vestidos con la coraza de justicia
15 y calzados los pies con el celo por anunciar el evangelio de la paz.
16 Sobre todo, tomad el escudo de la fe, con que podáis apagar todos los dardos de fuego del maligno.
17 Tomad el yelmo de la salvación, y la espada del Espíritu, que es la palabra de Dios.
18 Orad en todo tiempo con toda oración y súplica en el Espíritu, y velad en ello con toda perseverancia y súplica por todos los santos
19 y por mí, a fin de que al abrir mi boca me sea dada palabra para dar a conocer con denuedo el misterio del evangelio,
20 por el cual soy embajador en cadenas, y con denuedo hable de él como debo hablar.

16 rules for success

http://bp.bobparsons.com/gdshop/bp/gear.asp?ci=8283

1. Get and stay out of your comfort zone.
I believe that not much happens of any significance when we're in our comfort zone. I hear people say, "But I'm concerned about security." My response to that is simple: "Security is for cadavers."

2. Never give up.
Almost nothing works the first time it's attempted. Just because what you're doing does not seem to be working, doesn't mean it won't work. It just means that it might not work the way you're doing it. If it was easy, everyone would be doing it, and you wouldn't have an opportunity.

3. When you’re ready to quit, you’re closer than you think.
There's an old Chinese saying that I just love, and I believe it is so true. It goes like this: "The temptation to quit will be greatest just before you are about to succeed."

4. With regard to whatever worries you, not only accept the worst thing that could happen, but make it a point to quantify what the worst thing could be.
Very seldom will the worst consequence be anywhere near as bad as a cloud of "undefined consequences." My father would tell me early on, when I was struggling and losing my shirt trying to get Parsons Technology going, "Well, Robert, if it doesn't work, they can't eat you."

5. Focus on what you want to have happen.
Remember that old saying, "As you think, so shall you be."

6. Take things a day at a time.
No matter how difficult your situation is, you can get through it if you don't look too far into the future, and focus on the present moment. You can get through anything one day at a time.

7. Always be moving forward.
Never stop investing. Never stop improving. Never stop doing something new. The moment you stop improving your organization, it starts to die. Make it your goal to be better each and every day, in some small way. Remember the Japanese concept of Kaizen. Small daily improvements eventually result in huge advantages.

8. Be quick to decide.
Remember what General George S. Patton said: "A good plan violently executed today is far and away better than a perfect plan tomorrow."

9. Measure everything of significance.
I swear this is true. Anything that is measured and watched, improves.

10. Anything that is not managed will deteriorate.
If you want to uncover problems you don't know about, take a few moments and look closely at the areas you haven't examined for a while. I guarantee you problems will be there.

11. Pay attention to your competitors, but pay more attention to what you’re doing.
When you look at your competitors, remember that everything looks perfect at a distance. Even the planet Earth, if you get far enough into space, looks like a peaceful place.

12. Never let anybody push you around.
In our society, with our laws and even playing field, you have just as much right to what you're doing as anyone else, provided that what you're doing is legal.

13. Never expect life to be fair.
Life isn't fair. You make your own breaks. You'll be doing good if the only meaning fair has to you, is something that you pay when you get on a bus (i.e., fare).

14. Solve your own problems.
You'll find that by coming up with your own solutions, you'll develop a competitive edge. Masura Ibuka, the co-founder of SONY, said it best: "You never succeed in technology, business, or anything by following the others." There's also an old Asian saying that I remind myself of frequently. It goes like this: "A wise man keeps his own counsel."

15. Don’t take yourself too seriously.
Lighten up. Often, at least half of what we accomplish is due to luck. None of us are in control as much as we like to think we are.

16. There’s always a reason to smile.
Find it. After all, you're really lucky just to be alive. Life is short. More and more, I agree with my little brother. He always reminds me: “We’re not here for a long time, we’re here for a good time!”

Who's On First for the Next Generation

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?

Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.

George: Great. Lay it on me.

Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.

George: That's what I want to know.

Condi: That's what I'm telling you.

George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes.

George: I mean the fellow's name.

Condi: Hu.

George: The guy in China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The new leader of China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The Chinaman!

Condi: Hu is leading China.

George: Now whaddya' asking me for?

Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.

George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?

Condi: That's the man's name.

George: That's who's name?

Condi: Yes.

George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.

Condi: That's correct.

George: Then who is in China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir is in China?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Then who is?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.

Condi: Kofi?

George: No, thanks.

Condi: You want Kofi?

George: No.

Condi: You don't want Kofi.

George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi?

George: Milk! Will you please make the call?

Condi: And call who?

George: Who is the guy at the U.N?

Condi: Hu is the guy in China.

George: Will you stay out of China?!

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi.

George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

(Condi picks up the phone.)

Condi: Rice, here.

George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?

A 21st Century 'Who's on first?'

If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, "Who's on First?" might have turned out similar to this:

COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT


ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

ABBOTT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.

COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.

COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

ABBOTT: Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".

COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One copy.

COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few days later)

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on "START".............

No es tiempo todavía

Lo que no logres hoy, quizá mañana
Lo lograrás: no es tiempo todavía.
Nunca en el breve término de un día
Madura el trigo ni la espiga grana.

No son jamás en la labor humana
Vano el afán ni inútil la porfía.
El que con fe y valor lucha y confía,
Los mayores obstáculos allana.

Trabaja y persevera que, en el mundo
nada existe rebelde ni infecundo
Para el poder de Dios o de su idea;

Hasta la estéril y deforme roca
Es manantial cuando Moisés la toca
Y estatua cuando Fidias la golpea.

Amado Nervo

Nican Mopohua

English

118. "Listen, put it into your heart, my youngest-and-dearest son, that the thing that frightened you, the thing that afflicted you is nothing. Do not let it disturb you. Do not fear this sickness nor any other sickness, nor any sharp and hurtful thing.

119. Am I not here, I, who am your mother? Are you not under my shadow and protection? Am I not the source of your joy? Are you not in the hollow of my mantle, in the crossing of my arms? Do you need something more?

120. Let nothing else worry you, disturb you. Do not let your uncle's illness pressure you with grief, because he will not die of it now. You may be certain that he is already well".

http://weber.ucsd.edu/~dkjordan/nahuatl/nican/NicanMopohua.html


Español - Version 1

"Oye y ten entendido, hijo mío el más pequeño, que es nada lo que te asusta y aflige, no se turbe tu corazón, no temas esa enfermedad, ni otra alguna enfermedad y angustia. ¿No estoy yo aquí que soy tu Madre? ¿No estás bajo mi sombra? ¿No soy yo tu salud? ¿No estás por ventura en mi regazo? ¿Qué más has menester? No te apene ni te inquiete otra cosa; no te aflija la enfermedad de tu tío, que no morirá ahora de ella: está seguro que ya sanó".

http://www.corazones.org/maria/america/mexico_guada_nicanmopohua.htm


Español - Version 2

120. "Escucha, ponlo en tu corazón, hijo mío el menor, que no es nada lo que te espantó, lo que te afligió; que no se perturbe tu rostro, tu corazón; no temas esta enfermedad ni ninguna otra enfermedad ni cosa punzante, aflictiva.

121. ¿No estoy aquí yo, que soy tu madre? ¿No estas bajo mi sombra y resguardo? ¿No soy yo la fuente de tu alegría? ¿No estas en el hueco de mi manto, en el cruce de mis brazos? ¿Tienes necesidad de alguna otra cosa?

122. Que ninguna otra cosa te aflija, te perturbe; que no te apriete con pena la enfermedad de tu tío, porque de ella no morirá por ahora, ten por cierto que ya esta bueno".

http://mexica.ohui.net/textos/12/

Prayer of Pope Saint Pius X to Our Lady of Guadalupe

Approved by Pope Pius X on August, 1908.

Our Lady of Guadalupe,
Mystical Rose,
make intercession for the holy Church,
protect the Sovereign Pontiff,
help all those who invoke thee in their necessities,
and since thou art the ever Virgin Mary
and Mother of the true God,
obtain for us from thy most holy Son
the grace of keeping our faith,
sweet hope in the midst of the bitterness of life,
burning charity
and the precious gift of final perseverance.
Amen.


Virgen de Guadalupe,
Mística Rosa,
intercede por la Santa Iglesia,
protege al Soberano Pontífice,
ayuda a todos los que te invocan en sus necesidades,
y ya que tu eres la siempre Virgen María
y Madre del Dios Verdadero,
obtiene para nosotros de tu santísimo Hjo
la gracia de mantener nuestra fe,
dulce esperanza enmedio de la amargura de la vida,
caridad ardiente
y el precioso don de la perseverancia final.
Amén.

The Marian Antiphons

Alma Redemptoris Mater
From the First Sunday of Advent to the Feast of the Presentation
http://guanaco17.blogspot.com/2007/09/alma-redemptoris-mater.html


Ave Regina Cælorum
After the Presentation to Holy Saturday
http://guanaco17.blogspot.com/2007/10/ave-regina-caelorum.html


Regina Cæli
From Easter to Pentecost
http://guanaco17.blogspot.com/2007/10/regina-caeli.html


Salve Regina
After Pentecost until the First Sunday of Advent
http://guanaco17.blogspot.com/2007/10/salve-regina.html

Regina Caeli

Latīna

Regina caeli, laetare, alleluia:
Quia quem meruisti portare, alleluia,
Resurrexit, sicut dixit, alleluia,
Ora pro nobis Deum, alleluia.

V. Gaude et laetare, Virgo Maria, alleluia.
R. Quia surrexit Dominus vere, alleluia.

Oremus:
Deus, qui per resurrectionem Filii tui, Domini nostri Iesu Christi, mundum laetificare dignatus es: praesta, quaesumus; ut per eius Genetricem Virginem Mariam, perpetuae capiamus gaudia vitae. Per eundem Christum Dominum nostrum. Amen.


English

Queen of heaven, be joyful, alleluia:
The Son whom you merited to bear, alleluia,
Has risen, as He said, alleluia.
Pray for us to God, alleluia.

V. Rejoice and be glad, O Virgin Mary, alleluia.
R. For the Lord has truly risen, alleluia.

Let us pray:
O God, who gave joy to the world through the resurrection of Thy Son, our Lord Jesus Christ, grant we beseech Thee, that through the intercession of the Virgin Mary, His Mother, we may obtain the joys of everlasting life. Through the same Christ our Lord. Amen.


Español

Alégrate, Reina del cielo; aleluya
Porque el que mereciste llevar en tu seno; aleluya
Ha resucitado, según dijo; aleluya
Ruega por nosotros a Dios; aleluya.

V. Gózate y alégrate, Virgen María; aleluya.
R. Porque ha resucitado Dios verdaderamente; aleluya.

Oremos. Oh Dios, que por la resurrección de tu Hijo, nuestro Señor Jesucristo, te has dignado dar la alegría al mundo, concédenos que por su Madre, la Virgen María, alcancemos el goce de la vida eterna. Por el mismo Cristo Nuestro Señor. Amén.

Ave, Regina caelorum

Latīna

Ave, Regina caelorum,
Ave, Domina Angelorum:
Salve, radix, salve, porta
Ex qua mundo lux est orta:

Gaude, Virgo gloriosa,
Super omnes speciosa,
Vale, o valde decora,
Et pro nobis Christum exora.

V. Dignare me laudare te, Virgo sacrata.
R. Da mihi virtutem contra hostes tuos.

Oremus:
Concede, misericors Deus, fragilitati nostrae praesidium: ut, qui sanctae Dei Genitricis memoriam agimus; intercessionis eius auxilio, a nostris iniquitatibus resurgamus. Per eundem Christum Dominum nostrum. Amen.


English

Hail, O Queen of Heaven.
Hail, O Lady of Angels
Hail! thou root, hail! thou gate
From whom unto the world, a light has arisen:

Rejoice, O glorious Virgin,
Lovely beyond all others,
Farewell, most beautiful maiden,
And pray for us to Christ.

V. Allow me to praise thee, O sacred Virgin.
R. Against thy enemies give me strength.

Let us pray:
Grant unto us, O merciful God, a defense against our weakness, that we who remember the holy Mother of God, by the help of her intercession, may rise from our iniquities, through the same Christ our Lord. Amen.


Español

Salve, Reina de los cielos,
Salve, Reina de los Angeles:
salve raíz, salve puerta
que dio paso a nuestra luz.

Alégrate, Virgen gloriosa,
entre todas las mas bella,
salve, agraciada doncella,
ruega a Cristo por nosotros.

V. Permiteme que te alabe, Virgen sagrada.
R. Contra mis enemigos dame fuerzas.

Oremos:
Concédenos, Dios misericordioso, defensa contra nuestra fragilidad, que quienes recuerden a la Santa Madre de Dios, con la ayuda de su intercesión, resurgamos de nuestras iniquidades. Por Cristo nuestro Señor. Amén.

Salve Regina

Latīna

Salve, Regina, mater misericordiae.
Vita, dulcedo, et spes nostra, salve.
Ad te clamamus, exules filii Hevae.
Ad te suspiramus, gementes et flentes
in hac lacrimarum valle.

Eia, ergo, Advocata nostra, illos tuos
misericordes oculos ad nos converte.
Et Iesum, benedictum fructum ventris tui,
nobis post hoc exsilium ostende.

O clemens. O pia. O dulcis Virgo Maria.

V. Ora pro nobis, sancta Dei Genetrix.
R. Ut digni efficiamur promissionibus Christi.

Oremus
Omnipotens sempiterne Deus, qui gloriosae Virginis Matris Mariae corpus et animam, ut dignum Filii tui habitaculum effici mereretur, Spiritu Sancto cooperante, praeparasti: da, ut cuius commemoratione laetamur; eius pia intercessione, ab instantibus malis, et a morte perpetua liberemur. Per eundem Christum Dominum nostrum. Amen.


English

HAIL holy Queen, Mother of mercy.
Our life, our sweetness, and our hope.
To you we cry, poor banished children of Eve.
To you we send up our sighs, mourning and weeping
in this valley of tears.

Turn then, most gracious Advocate,
your eyes of mercy toward us.
And after this our exile
show unto us the blessed fruit of thy womb, Jesus.

O clement, O loving, O sweet Virgin Mary. Amen.

V. Pray for us, O Holy Mother of God.
R. That we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.

Let us pray
Almighty, everlasting God, who by the cooperation of the Holy Spirit, didst prepare the body and soul of the glorious Virgin-Mother Mary to become a worthy dwelling for Thy Son; grant that we who rejoice in her commemoration may, by her loving intercession, be delivered from present evils and from the everlasting death. By Christ our Lord. Amen.


Español

Salve, Reina, madre de misericordia.
Vida, dulzura y esperanza nuestra, salve.
A ti clamamos, los desterrados hijos de Eva.
A ti suspiramos, gimiendo y llorando
en este valle de lágrimas.

Ea, abogada nuestra, voltea
a nosotros tus ojos misericordiosos.
Y a Jesús, fruto bendito de tu vientre,
muéstralo después de este destierro.

Oh clemente. Oh piadosa. Oh dulce Virgen María.

V. Ruega por nosotros, santa Madre de Dios.
R. Y que seamos dignos de las promesas de Cristo.

Oremos
Omnipotente eterno Dios, que con la cooperación del Espíritu Santo, preparaste el cuerpo y el alma de la gloriosa Virgen y Madre María, para ser merecedora de ser digna morada de tu Hijo, concédenos que los que nos regocijamos en su conmemoración, por su piadosa intercesión, seamos libres de males presentes y de la muerte eterna. Por Cristo nuestro Señor. Amén.

Memorare

Latīna

MEMORARE, O piissima Virgo Maria,
non esse auditum a saeculo, quemquam ad tua currentem praesidia,
tua implorantem auxilia, tua petentem suffragia,
esse derelictum.
Ego tali animatus confidentia,
ad te, Virgo Virginum, Mater,
curro, ad te venio, coram te gemens peccator assisto.
Noli, Mater Verbi,
verba mea despicere; sed audi propitia et exaudi.
Amen.


English

REMEMBER, O most gracious Virgin Mary,
that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection,
implored thy help, or sought thy intercession
was left unaided.
Inspired with this confidence,
I fly to thee, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother;
to thee do I come; before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful.
O Mother of the Word Incarnate,
despise not my petitions,
but in thy mercy hear and answer me.
Amen.


Español

Recuerda, Oh piadosísima Virgen María,
que jamás se supo que alguien que acudiera a tu protección,
implorado tu auxilio, reclamado tu intercesión,
haya sido abandonado por ti.
Animado por esa confianza,
a ti, Vírgen de vírgenes, Madre,
a ti acudo, me presento gimiendo pecador.
No, Madre del Verbo,
desprecies mi súplica, óyela propicia y favorablemente.
Amén.

Suicide is Painless

Music: Johnny Mandel
Lyrics: Mike Altman


Through early morning fog I see
visions of the things to be
the pains that are withheld for me
I realize and I can see...

That suicide is painless
it brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.

I try to find a way to make
all our little joys relate
without that ever-present hate
but now I know that it's to late, and...

That suicide is painless
it brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.

The game of life is hard to play
I'm going to lose it anyway
the losing card I'll someday lay
so this is all I have to say

That suicide is painless
it brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.

The only way to win is cheat
and lay it down before I'm beat
and to another give my seat
for that's the only painless feat

That suicide is painless
it brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.

The sword of time will pierce our skins
it doesn't hurt when it begins
but as it works its way on in
the pain grows stronger...watch it grin but...

That suicide is painless
it brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.

A brave man once requested me
to answer questions that are key
is it to be or not to be
and I replied 'oh why ask me?'

'Cause suicide is painless
it brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please

...and you can do the same thing if you please.

Download: http://www.geocities.com/~cheshyre/mashsnds.htm

Wir sind Bettler. Hoc est verum.

Martin Luther last words:

Virgilium in Bucolicis nemo potest intelligere, nisi fuerit quinque annis pastor.
Virgilium in Georgicis nemo potest intelligere, nisi fuerit quinque annis agricola.
Ciceronem in Epistolis nemo integre intelligit, nisi viginti annis sit versatus in republica aliqua insigni.
Scripturas sanctas sciat se nemo degustasse satis, nisi centum annis cum Prophetis, ut Elia et Elisaeo, Joanne Baptista, CHRISTO et Apostolis Ecclesias gubernarit.
Hanc tu ne Aenëida tenta,
Sed vestigia pronus adora.
Wir sind Bettler, Hoc est verum. 16 Februarij, anno 1546

Nobody can understand Vergil in his Bucolics, unless he has been a shepherd for five years.
Nobody can understand Vergil in his Georgics, unless he has been a farmer for five years.
Nobody understands Cicero in his Letters, unless he has been engaged in public affairs of some consequence for twenty years.
Let nobody suppose that he has tasted the Holy Scriptures sufficiently unless he has governed churches for a hundred years with the Prophets, like Elijah and Eliseo, John the Baptist, CHRIST and the Apostles.
Lay not your hand on the Aeneid,
but bow before it, adore its every trace.
We are beggars. That is true. February 16, 1546

How funny am I?

Your Score: the Idiot Savant

(33% dark, 50% spontaneous, 57% vulgar)

your humor style:
VULGAR | SPONTANEOUS | LIGHT

You like things silly, immediate, and, above all, outrageous. Ixne on the subtle word play, more testicles on fire, please. People like you are the most likely to RECEIVE internet forwards--and also the most likely to save them in a special folder entitled 'HOLY SHIT'.

Because it's so easily appreciated, and often wacky and physical, your sense of humor never ceases to amuse your friends. Most realize that there's a sly intelligence and a knowing wink to your tastes. Your sense of humor could be called 'anti-pretentious'--but paradoxically enough, that indicates you're smarter than most.

PEOPLE LIKE YOU: Johnny Knoxville - Jimmy Kimmel




The 3-Variable Funny Test!
- it rules -

If you're interested, try my best friend's best test: The Genghis Khan Genetic Fitness Masterpiece

Link: The 3 Variable Funny Test written by jason_bateman on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

The dee dee dee song

Carlos Mencia

Spoken:
Dee dee dee, doesn’t mean mentally retarded. It means stupid. This song goes out to all the stupid people out there, you’re gonna find this song hilarious, and you don’t even know…it’s about you.

[Verse 1]
You dropped out of school cause you’re smarter than everybody
I got three words for you dumbass, "Ding, fries ready"
You try to outrun a bull, but nobody’s that fast
That’s how you end up, with a horn stuck up your ass
Roethlisberger needs no helmet cause he’s a star
But the year the bus left, he got hit by a car
You wanna go huntin’ for quail someplace
Don’t go with Cheney, he’ll put a fucking shot in your face
If you bungee jump so you can fly through the air
I ain’t upset you ended up in that wheelchair
You ignore all the warnings, yeah you light up a smoke
Now you have to talk with a machine through your throat

[Chorus]
How many idiots can there be?
Some say that it’s 1 out of 3
If you don’t know then take it from me
You’re the dee dee dee

(spoken) you you you
dee dee dee

And if you are a Dee
Please don’t marry a Dee
Cause then your kids will be (what? what?)
Dee dee dee

(spoken) dee dee dee

[Verse 2]
You cry about the price of gas and war in Iraq
But you voted Bush in twice,
what were you smoking, crack?
Didn’t get a prenup, though you knew she was a skank
Now you’ve got herpes and she’s got half your bank
You were on top of the world with "Hit Me Baby One More Time"
Only a stupid bitch would marry Kevin Federline
You drink and drive and you think it’s okay
Now you’re cell mate’s weaving in and out the "hershey highway"
When you put tigers on your show and they can’t be free
They’ll bite your neck off and then you’ll say (chokingly) "dee dee dee" (cough)

[Chorus]
How many idiots can there be?
Some say that it’s 1 out of 3
If you don’t know then take it from me
You’re the dee dee dee

(spoken) you you you
Dee dee dee

And if you are a Dee
Please don’t marry a Dee
It’s genetics don’t you see?
Your kids will be dee dee dee

(spoken)
That’s what they’re gonna be: DEE DEE DEE!!!

[Verse 3]
Parents are to blame for all these dee dee dee’s
Letting their kids drop out and not get GED’s
You keep your kids inside cause there’s freaks on the loose
But yet you let them drink from Michael Jackson’s "Jesus Juice"?
You don’t care when your kids come home with D’s from class
What you need to do is get some balls and beat that ass
He isn’t stupid, you say he’s got A.D.D.
It’s that his mom and his dad are both dee dee dee!

[Bridge]
This test is too hard! (So they lower the standards)
I’m not good at sports! (So they give them all trophies)
My dad used to spank me (So they lower the standards)
I’m too fat for this seat (So they widen the standards)
They say no cause I’m black (So they lower the standards)
They say no cause I’m white (So they lower the standards)
They say no cause I’m Asian (So they lower the standards)
No hablo inglés (???)

[Verse 4]
And you wake up one day and you don’t have the skills
To get a better job so you’re stuck on the grill
You’re wondering why Julio took your job
But you forget to see, you’re as dumb as a knob
Now, your ass is too fat to get out of the house
And you’re eating more food trying to figure it out
Why they outsource my job to some guy named Habib
Cause he works harder than you and he’s got 5 degrees
And you’re asking yourself how could this happen to me
I’ll tell you why, homie! Cause you’re….dee dee dee


Video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vXju2l815rY